This song I sing will mean many things. So if you find a way to feel, I’ll give to you my words, for you to hide or steal – just increments of me passed on and passed away ‘til that moment you might see all I gave was all I had today.
Both lost to the misery we choose, we sink deeper among the demons that make us hate to feel and help us lose. I’ve dipped my feet in water so cold it burns. And kissed the fruit that sours and turns. I’ve shone in the dark and faded with the light. I’ve mended my wounds and climbed to new heights. And still the moon glistens, and the sun tingles my skin. So I know my living just might not be a dying sin.
I’m here, but I’m gone. My words are all I have left to whisper or scream or not speak at all. I’ll just place them here. And make my
entrance or take my fall.
I’ve dealt with negativity all week. It makes my head hurt. I cut a friend loose and finally accepted the betrayal of the only person who could hurt me. It makes my stomach turn. It makes me mad at myself. It makes my arches ache.
So I’ve decide to become addicted. The way I have it figured – I only really have maybe 30 years left. My kids will be grown, and I’ll be retired. Why not live out those years homeless, giving BJs in some alley for my next fix and thinking my thoughts are poetry.
But numb. I wanna know numb.
I just want out!
Let me out.
I can’t take the talk,
the mindless conversation,
the getting ignored.
So just let me go.
Let me let go
of the hope that
I belong, and that
I’m someone who matters
among the crowd.
I keep thinking you are going to be the person I thought you were. But you aren’t.
Priorities get slanted as I sit on the sidelines while you search for something more.
(Somehow I’ve lost myself).
And I watch you grow more restless as you look everywhere but here.
(I never thought this would be us).
Memories get lost at the sight of something new, and when time runs out, there’s just nothing more I can do.
(I know it’s over).
And see just like that it’s gone – a fleeting thought, a whisper, the twilight and the dawn. In that moment before waking and in the shadows of sleep, were you truly there beside me or somewhere beyond my reach?